Why didn't I become a paleontologest?

Do you ever have those moments in your life where you're doing something random, and suddenly a thought hits you out of left field?  This is exactly what happened to me the other day.


I was reading an old National Geographic Magazine.  (March 2003 if you're interested.) It has a beautiful image of a mechanical replica of Tyrannosaurus Rex on the cover.  Which is why I saved the magazine to begin with.  Dinosaurs excite me.  Ever since I was a kid, I was that odd girl who was obsessed with them.


I used to have a book; I think the actual title of it was simply, Dinosaurs. I treasured that book and would look through the pictures and wonder about all of them.  I loved them all of course, but I had my favorites.  T. Rex, Velociraptor, Brontosaurus, Triceratops, Pterodactyl...the list goes on, literally, because there were so many.


Of course, pint-sized, half-assed me, didn't do a lot of reading up on these dinosaurs.  I created my own ideas of these creatures, even back then, my desire for everything to get along made me imagine that all the dinosaurs were friends and they ate something other than each other.  The T. Rex was just misunderstood, obviously.


Then Jurassic Park came out. My 11-year-old heart fluttered with excitement and fear.  The Velociraptors and T. Rex nailed it.  I loved everything about that movie. (Shame on me for not yet watching Jurassic World by the way.)


Is it weird that the sound of a T. Rex makes me insanely happy?  Possibly, but I don't care.


On visits to museums I would be overwhelmed (in a good way.) with the thought that these creatures actually once walked the earth.  They existed.  Muscle and flesh covered the bones, and I was that idiot human smiling up at them wanting to be friends.  (My imagination has always been epic, and the one good quality I have.)  I still get that way. 


So, why then did I not pursue a career in paleontology? 


Only intelligent people can survive and thrive in careers in science.   (Upon reflection, I noticed that most of my interests are in that genre.)  The sad truth is that I'm not smart enough to hold onto the information.  I can't pronounce some of the terminology used, let alone spell it or know what it means.  Even the names of the dinosaurs are just "out there." Sinornithosaurus, Confuciusornis, Aucasaurus, Einiosaurus, Styracosaurus.  I mean c'mon.  You know the scientists gave up when they named Giganotosaurus. 

But the truth is, I didn't think about it as a career choice.  I wanted to be a Veterinarian.  I wanted to take care of animals.  Then I wanted to be an Archaeologist, then and Egyptologist.  Math got in the way of all these careers, as well as my general lack of ambition.   I'm not a scholarly person.   I like a lot of things but don't delve deep into the subject matter.  So my half-assery extends to all aspects of my life.

As I get older, however, I find that I'm more apt to research things.  Mainly because the invention of the internet makes it a heck of a lot easier to get the information.  I'm always googling.

I have a problem retaining the information, and that upsets me.  I don't remember half of the things that I read in the National Geographic article.  I don't know why.  I was enthralled while reading it, but as soon as I was finished and tried to ask myself follow-up questions, it all left my brain.  I've always had this problem, hence my bad grades in school.

Ah well.  What can I do?